Marriage is a gamble ... how true

Called an old friend few days ago. Heard about another friend from her. The friend is living separately from the husband, has two kids - boy aged 6 and girl aged 4 and is now three-month pregnant. The husband has admitted to having an affair with another woman, a Chinese, and made it very clear he will not leave the woman, but at the same will not divorce her. Neither she asks that from him. Many are urging her to get a divorce through Syariah Court as the husband doesn't provide nafkah, zahir or batin. But she refuses for the sake of the children as although the husband has been mistreating her, he is close to the kids and they adore him.
I pity her and also admire her for her act of unselfishness. If I were in her shoes, I would have put my feeling first, no matter what. Many friends seem to be calling her stupid for doing so. But I think she's doing what she thinks is right at this moment. For the kids, and I'm sure she still loves the husband. It takes lots of love and understanding for someone to tolerate such infidelity.
It must really hurt knowing our partner has turned and given his heart to somebody else ... I couldn't imagine what would happen to me if I were to face such a situation. I would cry tear and blood, pull my hair, roll on the floor, use my kids to get him back (I hope I won't do this), blablabla ... but in the end, we cannot force others to love us. It comes naturally and it also dies naturally, and perhaps, it may come back naturally, if that happens, maybe we can call that true love, which has been tested, failed and repented.
As for my friend, I pray God gives her continuous strength and I hope one day, she will have the courage and is willing to let him go and start fresh. Above all, I hope she'll find someone who truly loves her, that meants loving the kids too.

A lazy Thursday

It seems that everybody at the office feels lazy today, including myself. It's hard to concentrate on your work when you don't feel like working at all. Finishing one page takes me, like, the whole night. Giving good heading is another problem.

Call my daughter.
Daughter: ???? dah makan dah. Makan nasi. (Aiik ... blum tanya dah dapat jawapan)
Me: Ayah buat apa?
Daugther: Ayah tido adik dia.
Me: ???? buat apa tadi?
Daughter: ???? nak tido dah.
Me: Ibu mana?
Daughter: Ibu pegi ofis.

hmmmm ... I see some improvement in her conversation.

It's a jungle out there

After almost 10 years working here, I sometimes find myself wondering if I have actually missed better opportunities out there. This place doesn't really have potential. But then, I am not very ambitious either, although I know I can do better things outside there. Perhaps, I can be better, focusing on the real thing, like raising up my kids, spending more time with them... Any pay for that?

Another layout ... what???

Working today, though it's a Sunday. We're on another layout revamp, which I think doesn't make any difference though. Don't know who's idea ... the new look doesn't look good either to me. Feel like we're shortchanging readers. Very few stories, meaning less content. We'll miss out on many news just because we want to have bigger stories, pics, headings, graphics and illustrations. Two line heading across 6 columns. Hmmm ... like we're putting the whole text in the heading. Anyway, I'm just a kuli here.

My conversation with my 2-years-old daughter over the phone.
Me: Hello, dah makan?
Daughter: Dah. Makan nasi.
Me: Mana ada nasi? (I didn't cook any rice today)
Daughter: Ada la. Ayah masak.
Me: Ayah buat apa?
Daughter: Ayah tgh tido adik kan. (Ayah's putting Adik to bed)
Me: ???? pukul adik ya?
Daughter: Tak lah. Mana ada.

I can smile to myself now. My daughter can now express herself very well, sometimes I find myself ignoring what she says when she gets too hyper-talkactive.

unforgotten friend

Had supper with a former colleague at a restaurant near workplace. Good to see her again. These days, I've been quite unhappy with my work and office. In fact, today before I came to work, I had actually browsed through job vacancies classified section in the Star. Maybe it's time to look for a new job.

Am trying to upload pics but not successful.

Got to start somewhere!

Have been thinking to start a blog though don't really know how to start and what to write. So, here I'm. Hmmm ... what's now?