Some Company Still Makes Profit

The current global economic slowdown has seen many Malaysian companies posting smaller gains, some even slipping into the red. It's tough time, and the October-December results would reflect more accurately how businesses in Malaysia are affected by the crisis.

But something is so mind-boggling, that a tobacco company still posts growth in earnings despite the difficult time. That shows that Malaysians don't stop smoking even in the time like now. They may not have the money to eat, buy books, school the children, bla, bla, bla, but the smoking habit must go on. Isn't that scary? And cigarettes are not cheap these days. A box of 20s is priced at about RM9, that makes a stick at about 45 sen. Quite a luxury, no?

My partner is not a heavy smoker. Even, in good times, he hardly finished a box per day. These days, he replaces his normal box of cigarettes with loose tobacco which he buys for RM15 per pack. He rolls his own cigarettes with special cigarette papers. I don't know what they are called. But they are plain white paper cut in small rectangular pieces. If you feel like puffing, you just roll tobacco in them, and there you have, home-made rolled cigarettes! A pack of that loose tobacco may last my partner about two weeks, if I'm not mistaken.

The concern is, I'm not sure if those home-made cigarettes are 'any worse' than the commercial ones. I'm afraid they would cause much more harm. Well, the commercial ones have filters, for example. The self-rolled ones have none of those. I tried arguing with him about this once. But since I didn't have much 'evidence' to pursue my case further, I just stopped half way. Furthermore, If you are almost, errr more of less, a little bit a smoker yourself (means you smoke like two or three sticks a day, the most), it's a bit difficult to argue, isnt' it?

Enal Is Gone Too

Cousin H's son, Enal, passed away last Thursday of heart complication. He was 18 or 19. The last time I saw him was during Hari Raya about five years ago when H and her family visited us in Terengganu. Even on the day he died, I missed the chance to see 'him' because when I arrived the funeral was already over.

Enal had always been sicked since he was a baby, having inherited a 'legacy' from parents and three uncles (my cousins), called 3 As, who all died very young at 16, 19 and 17. Specky and a little bit plump, he was a jovial kid, although a little bit quiet and reserved. His passing away very young reminded me of his uncles and brought back what was once talk in the kampung that H's family was doomed with sumpah 7 keturunan. Maybe it's true, not about the sumpahan, but that it takes seven generation for an inherited sickness to dissapear.

Looking calm and more matured, H has always been an epitome of strength to me. The one who has gone through countless hardship, having losing her parents and four brothers, including a baby brother, when she was in her teens. Married at a young age, she and her husband are blessed with six children, including Enal, the eldest.

Despite having gone through many losses, I believe, nothing ever prepares a person for the loss of own child. Enal was the first child and the first one always leaves the most of memories. It's sad to see how much H tried to maintain that strong facade. But sometimes, it crumbled as the grief was too heavy for her thin and tired frame to bear.

But it's a blessing that she has many children that make her days busy. At least, she would not have time to really ponder over the loss. But I also know at night, she would be staring through the darkness thinking about Enal and probably crying, alone. Because I also know, her husband is the type who's always Not There for her.

Sometimes, hardship is inherited, just like sickness is. I wonder what it takes for her to come out of the hardship. Most probably she would stick to it and it to her like second skin. Like I said she's one tough lady. And when the children grow up, they would make up for what their mother has missed. I hope they will and think they will, insyaallah.

Al-Fatihah for Enal. May he rest in peace.